Our Small Group Discussion topic this month is drawn from results of studies reported by the Council on Contemporary Families.

Called "Unconventional Wisdom" (http://www.contemporaryfamilies.org/subtemplate.php?t=briefingPapers&ext=unconventionalwisdom  ) this motley collection of varied family factoids -- some expected, some probably not -- provides ripe fodder for discussion and understanding. Visit our LIFE Blog at http://learningis4everyone.blogspot.com/ for at look at some of the findings, and to link to the larger report and additional resources.

Among the findings:
*Despite recent horrific events such as the killings in Virginia, most youth trends have been positive over the past 10-15 years. In 2004, violent crime in schools had fallen to less than half of the rate in 1994. The 2004 rate was one-third less than the 1991 peak rate. The high school dropout rate was eight percent in 2004 – down from 11 percent in 2000

*Given the newly expanded lifespan, most people will spend more time caring for their parents than they will care for their children.

*According to the Bureau of Justice Statistics, over 2.5 million children have one or both parents incarcerated. In the absence of positive intervention, children of incarcerated parents are at extremely high risk for negative personal and social behaviors such as anger, anxiety, physical aggression, substance abuse, sexual promiscuity and the potential for criminal activity. In fact, they are five times more likely than their peers to end up in prison themselves.

*In a 12-year study comparing gay and lesbian couples with heterosexual couples,Dr. John Gottman (University of Washington) and Dr. Robert Levenson (University of California at Berkeley) found that, overall, relationship satisfaction and quality are about the same across all couple types (straight, gay, lesbian). Compared to straight couples, gay and lesbian couples use more affection and humor when they bring up a disagreement, and partners are more positive in how they receive it. Gay and lesbian couples are also more likely to remain positive after a disagreement. Gay and lesbian partners display less belligerence, domineering and fear with each other than straight couples do.

*Contrary to popular opinion, young teens do not use the net as a substitute for real friendships. The majority of young teenagers are in deep conversations on the internet. Families that encourage conversations about their children’s involvement fare better than those who simply ban its use.

*In a nationally representative study of more than 1000 young people in the 3rd through the 12th grades asked : “If you were granted one wish that would change the way that your mother’s/your father’s work affects your life, what would that wish be?” most children wished that their mothers (34%) and their fathers (27.5%) would be less stressed and tired.

What do you think? What's your "contemporary family" like?  What do we share in common? What's different?

Share your thoughts back here or on our blog.

In continued freedom of living and learning,

Terri Willingham
Learning is for Everyone
www.learningis4everyone.org